They might make an effort to bait you into anger, then falsely accuse you of rejecting them, move you to doubt truth along with your sanity, and on occasion even brainwash you as psychological manipulation. It is really not uncommon to allow them to stop buddies and family members who they feel have betrayed them. They respond to their profound worries of abandonment with needy and clingy behavior or anger and fury that reflect their very own skewed truth and self-image.
In a relationship that is close they have to walk a tightrope to balance driving a car of being alone or to be too near. To do this, they make an effort to get a handle on with commands or manipulation, including flattery and seduction. Whereas narcissists enjoy being grasped, way too much understanding frightens the borderline. Generally speaking, borderlines are codependent, and discover another codependent to merge with and also to assist them to.
They look for anyone to offer security and balance their changeable feelings. A codependent or narcissist who functions self-sufficient and controls his / her emotions can offer a match that is perfect. The individual with BPD can happen to function as underdog when you look at the relationship, while his / her partner could be the constant, needless and caretaking dog that is top.
They each workout control in numerous means. The non-BPD might do so through caretaking. Passion and intense feelings are enlivening to your individual without BPD, whom discovers being alone depressing or experiences healthier individuals as bland. Codependents currently have low self-esteem and bad boundaries, so they really placate, take care of, and apologize whenever assaulted so that you can take care of the psychological connection in the connection.